When people get intimidated, it can often become debilitating. You know what to do, how to do it and the steps you need to take to get started, but you just can’t physically bring yourself to take action. What is stopping you? You recognize that you’re standing in your own way, but that’s not the only problem.
It can be easy to see your goal, but difficult to actually go for it. There’s a difference between understanding and taking action. You’re not alone, and it’s not something that only happens to you. Some common mental blocks that prevent people from moving forward include:
- Fear (of failure, of the unknown or of the opinions of others)
- Not believing you’re qualified enough
- Anxiety/depression
- Self-doubt
It’s important to remember that you should go for it anyway. You have to! You can’t have someone sitting next to you every second of the day, helping you through the doubt and pushing you to get things done. That has to come from within.
This is ironic, because people do try to tell each other what to do all the time. They repeat the steps you’re already aware will get you to your goal. For awhile, you might even feel inspired, but eventually that wears off. They don’t get that there is something greater stopping you, and their pushiness can sometimes cause you to take steps in the opposite direction. That’s okay. To keep going, you have to learn to ignore those factors. Just know that you can do it. It might be on your own time, but you’ve got this. You’ll eventually get tired of putting things off and feeling like you are failing yourself, and that’s when it’s time to act.
When you think about a life goal, such as applying to college, and you know it’s a big step towards the future, it can become terrifyingly daunting. It’s easy to focus on the potential for failure. Nobody wants to be told they aren’t good enough to do something they have their mind set on, but as cliché as it sounds, you’ll never succeed if you don’t try. That’s just a fact. So how do you get over the mental block?
Here are some questions to ask yourself that could help clear the path:
- Why do you have this goal?
- Do you still want this?
- Is there something better you could do right now?
- Are you pursuing this for the wrong reasons?
We are all capable of accomplishing our goals, whether that means getting into college, pursuing a graduate degree, applying for a job you don’t feel qualified for, starting a YouTube channel or traveling the world. Some people seem to handle their emotions and get past their mental blocks easily, while others have the added challenge of finding a way around the crippling fear. But keep in mind that you never know what’s going on in another person’s brain.
Even those who seem like they can do anything can have mental blocks — they might just be better at hiding it. Open up to people and talk about this. Something you can try: find someone who has done what you want to do, figure out how they did it, then give that a shot. Get as much insight as you can on potential ways to accomplish your goal. You might find something that feels more manageable than the steps you’ve already laid out for yourself!
Most importantly, stop stressing about whatever it is that you aren’t doing. Know that you have accomplished many great things to get where you are, and in some ways, it’s a privilege to even have that kind of worry. You get to go to college. Then, you have a job you’re trying to grow out of. You’re always improving on your education. You have a talent or thoughts that you want to express to the world. You have an opportunity to experience other cultures.
At the end of the day, your goals don’t define you. If you push them back a year, you’re still you, and there’s a lot more to who you are as a person than what you do. Sometimes people get caught up in where they get their confidence, and when there’s no growth in that area, it hurts (especially if you think it’s your own fault). That can be a hard blow to your self-esteem. Just remember that you are you, and you are capable. All the rest will come in time.
If you feel that you’d like to talk to someone, Eastern Florida State College has a resource called EFSCares — a free, confidential counseling service that is available to all students. It can sometimes be difficult to determine or express that you’re struggling with feelings of uncertainty or doubt, but trying to work through that can help you get to know yourself and decide where to go in life.
So here’s to you! Knowing what you want and understanding your mental block is half the battle.
“You are strong. You are capable. And you are beautiful.”
Follow this mantra, and keep in mind that you haven’t felt it all. You have a lot left to experience in life — so don’t be afraid to take the plunge!
- Build Your Confidence by Coming To Campus: Part 3 - February 19, 2020
- Build Your Confidence by Coming To Campus: Part 2 - February 5, 2020
- Build Your Confidence by Coming To Campus: Part 1 - January 8, 2020
